Well I for one am exhausted.
I told myself I was going to boycott the Grammy Awards because Janelle Monae´ wasn't nominated for anything despite having one of the best albums of 2013.
But I got sucked in by the promise of performances by Pink, Carole King, and Beyonce´.
So let's go through the highs, lows, and whys of The Grammy Awards of 2014.
- Opening with Queen Yonce´: They had me from the get go and I knew it was going to be a rough ride after it ended. Which is exactly what happened. Beyonce´? Sexier than ever. Giving us the first televised performance from BEYONCE´, the album no one saw coming, she didn't disappoint.
- John Legend: Proof that if something is good there's no reason to change it. Romantic song. Great song. Performed without extra runs or extra vocals. Brilliant. Beautiful. Seriously I could've done with a whole night of John Legend being amazing. Bonus points to the director for getting the camera/lighting guys to have his wife, whom he wrote the song for in the background under a spotlight in the audience.
- Dave Grohl Winning a Grammy: That's it. Nothing else. Let rock music live on the way it should.
- Pink & Mustache Nate: Pink and Nate are two performers who are underrated and are rarely given the accolades they deserve. Pink's vocals were still superior and greater than most of the people in the category she was nominated in and that was just on the recorded version. Nevermind the live vocals that prove she's the best. Mustache Nate has something that draws me in with his vocals and with the music he writes. Never heard a bad thing from him. Doubt I ever will when it comes to the two of them.
- A Kendrick Lamar & Imagine Dragons: Is my roof still on my house? Is my couch broken? Do I still have vocal chords? I don't know. But what I do know is I was hyped and in love with this new Ebony & Ivory. It was hip-hop. It was rock. It was fantastic. I wanted more as soon as it was over. Fingers crossed they make more music together in 2014.
- Pharrell Williams/Daft Punk/Nile Rogers Feat: Stevie Wonder: This was my favorite performance of the night. Blending Lucky with Stevie Wonder vocals/tracks was something I didn't know I wanted until I heard it. I want more of Daft Punk. I want more of Pharrell Williams with Daft Punk. I want more real music.
- Carole King Harmonizing with Sara Bareilles: One. I've loved Carole King since I was a toddler. Tapestry is still very firmly placed in my top ten albums of all time and I doubt it will ever not be in that list. Two. Sara Bareilles is fantastic and wonderful. Having seen her live she's an amazing artist that I constantly want more of. Combine the two and you get a mashup of musical perfection. I honestly wish we had them perform more than the five minutes they were on stage.
- Oh Lorde: The girl looked like she was trying to fly away with her arm movements. But it wasn't even the worst part. The worst part is that Royals won twice in one night. Royals was the song of 2013 that I wanted to set on fire.
- Speaking of Fire... : Who decided that Robin Thicke would perform with Chicago? Who decided that I would be forced to listen to Blurred Lines yet again for no reason? I want to set this entire unnecessary overplayed song (that is still pretty rape friendly and needs to be stopped) ablaze.
- Taylor Swift Rock Ballad?: Taylor Swift's best performance. By that I mean her vocals weren't that off. She still needs work on them. Because I have a heard-That's where I was going when she started flipping her hair around and her head off her shoulders. She flipped around so much that she lost her key and her oxygen. Try again next time, T Swizzle.
- Katy Perry Works for Disney: I spent the entire performance of "Dark Horse" waiting for Angelina Jolie to pop out and make Juicy J touch the spindle on a spinning wheel. It was like a dark mumbling hot mess of drama and theatrics for a basic song.
- Team Trying Too Hard to Still Be Cool: Obviously I'm talking about Madonna and Steven Tyler. Most unnecessary additions of the night. They were irrelevant in comparison to the people around them. That is all.
- Justin Timberlake: Why were you robbed after a great comeback?
- Janelle Monae´ / M.I.A. : WHY WEREN'T YOU NOMINATED/PERFORMING?!
- Ariana Grande: Why weren't you performing? You're amazing live.
- Julia Roberts: Why were you there?
- LL Cool J: Why were you in velvet?
- Pharrell Williams: Why are you a park ranger? / Why are you wearing the Arby's logo? / Where are Rocky & Bullwinkle? / WHY?!
- Taylor Swift: Why were you the first person they went to whenever a black artist was on stage?
- Daft Punk: Why can't we see your lovely Frenchy French faces?
- Newly Married Grammy Couples: Is it amazing and wonderful to have Queen Latifah officiating your wedding? (It seems like it.)
- People Who Run The Grammy Awards: WHY DID I GET SO MANY LACKLUSTER PERFORMANCES FROM THE SAME ARTISTS AND NO LOVE FOR THE R&B WINNERS OR PERFORMERS?? After a big year for Tamar Braxton, Alicia Keys, Lalah Hathaway, Miguel, Anthony Hamilton, Gary Clark Jr., Bruno Mars, John Legend, and TGT. WHY DID I RECEIVE NOTHING?? Oh you gave me rap? Why was there no performance of Fantasia, Kelly Rowland, AND MISSY ELLIOT after they made one of the hottest tracks of the year with "Without Me"? WHY?! Maybe we could've stopped shooting to Taylor Swift every five seconds in the audience if you gave the people you decided to make invisible a little screen time. It was a GREAT year for R&B music and we got nothing. Absolutely nothing. Biggest musical letdown I've ever seen.
All I can say is that I hope the next music award show I watch is actually worth four hours of my life. Because based on this one I could've been done in an hour and a half and still been awake enough to watch an episode of NCIS.
I want more out of my artists. I know it's unfair to compare todays artists to Whitney Houston and Michael Jackson. But I don't think it's too much to ask for them to give me something worth my money. I want to be blown away by every performance. I want to get chills. I want to get excited about music. And unfortunately I'm not getting any of that from a lot of the "heavy hitting" artists from this awards show.
Until next time.